I was recently in Scottsdale, Arizona for a work conference and it gave me the opportunity to rent a car and drive down to Tucson to see him. As I pulled into the driveway there dad was waiting, smiling, like a father coming home after a long day of work, his daughter anxiously watching out the window so she can run outside and hug him. You could feel the anticipation as I got out of the car and he grabbed onto me like it had been years. In an Alzheimer's world, that means so much more than a hug, but it means he remembers me, his daughter.
While I visited I did the normal things I do when I show up within the first few hours. The old standby memory tests, the looking around the house for cleanliness, the opening of the refrigerator for nutrition, and the driving test. When dealing with someone that is in their own denial of how they are doing, these tests give you so much information on whats going on in the brain. The results give me a glimpse of my father's livelihood and where we are at with the disease and of course he always asks me for my diagnosis before I head to the airport. A sign he is still aware of what we are dealing with and a question that if he didn't ask, would be telling of his state of mind.
During this trip we spent, as we always do, a night out on the patio drinking wine and listening to Bob Dylan. Dad reminisced to the memories of this music and his time in San Francisco in the 60's. He talked about the friends he made, the trips to Sonoma and Carmel, his casino days in Lake Tahoe and his time in Newport Beach. This is when I got an idea. A road trip. Not just any road trip, but the chance to spend two weeks traveling with my father to the places he fondly remembers. A chance to take pictures and document a unique experience with my father, one last trip before we call it. An opportunity to use a recorder to grab the stories he remembers from childhood and his days in California while we drive. This will be a trip up the Pacific Coast highway that we will never forget. This will give me an experience I know I will never regret and allow me to spend time with my father while he can recall the past and experience the present (although cloudy at times) in this short window. It will also be a chance for me to remind dad, when he can't remember who I am, this experience we shared by pulling out the pictures and recordings to ease his confused mind.
He was so excited when I told him what we were doing, I tasked him with projects around the trip to keep him busy and to get his mind moving. I do have to remind him we are doing this every time we talk on the phone but I get the same enthusiasm every time. It's like reliving Christmas all over again. As I prepare for the trip in October, I can't wait to see him in his element, blasting Bob Dylan in the car and just cruising down the Pacific Coast Highway, experiencing life through dads memories while I have them.
